Skip to main content
Yesterday morning was an excellent run, I must say. I was full of energy and felt very strong at the end. Of course, I felt just as strong at the end of the 10 mile run we did before the 20 mile run, but hey, who's keeping track?



They new shoes felt great and I took some of these supplements called Very Greens (from Trader Joe's, only 10 bucks), which kept me feeling full (i.e. not depleted of energy) during the run. And I had a pretty full breakfast with two scrambled eggs and a bagel. Is this the right combination? Who knows? I think the eggs and their protein is the way to go, though. I'll have to check into that when we get to Hawaii.



I completed the "Thank You" cards on Friday and it was quite a good feeling. We didn't do anything last night. Tonight we had the Cruz's and the Millers (from down the street) over for dinner. It was one of those occasions in which both families had never really met so we wondered whether they'd get along. The night was wonderful. Jules cooked a great Ziti dish and all of the kids got along great.



It is strange to think that next week at this time I will have completed the marathon. And I say that with confidence. I WILL complete the marathon. I'll admit there were a couple of weeks that I was unsure. But now that I can feel it drawing closer... I have no doubt. And whether or not I'm sore and need to crash (which I hope not), I know there are people around the country who have been rooting for me, no matter what. That's quite a feeling to have and it's energy I will be drawing from and harnessing during the run. When I start feeling low, I can tell myself whom I am running for. And when I start feeling less confident, I can listen to the voices of those friends and family who have contacted me over the course of these six months and have those inner voices cheer me on.



I was able to do a little of this when I was attempting my ill-fated Bowling Green 18 miles run in the arctic winds. Yet, having practiced this type of visualization back then, I'm pretty sure I'll be able to use it come next week.



This has been a really great weekend. After church this morning, I played hide and seek with Soph and Jake. I can't recall having that much fun with them and giggling and laughing with them by just being silly. I can't describe the feeling of being loved like that. Maybe I've said that a couple of times. But to have another human just love you no matter what... God! It is the greatest feeling in the world.



And then there's Jules.



I had a dream last night that left me waking up with the fear of losing her. I rarely remember any of dreams, and although I don't recall any of the specifics, I woke up looking for her. And when I looked over at her sleeping, with the kids in between us, I had a huge sigh of relief. I would be lost without her. I would be nothing.



Can't wait to get out of Los Angeles and just be a family on our own for a week.



Aloha.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

MARATHON FOOTNOTES (for those who didn't think I would really footnote a stream of consciousness thought): Footnote #1 Academy Award Winning Best Picture Films from 1969 to the Present: Midnight Cowboy, Patton, The French Connection, The Godfather, The Sting, The Godfather II, One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, Rocky, Annie Hall, The Deer Hunter, Kramer Vs. Kramer, Ordinary People, Chariots of Fire, Gandhi, Terms of Endearment, Amadeus, Out of Africa, Platoon, The Last Emperor, Rain Man, Driving Miss Daisy, Dances With Wolves, The Silence of the Lambs, Unforgiven, Schindler’s List, Forrest Gump, Braveheart, The English Patient, Titanic, Shakespeare in Love, American Beauty, Gladiator, A Beautiful Mind, Chicago, Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King. Footnote #2 Members of the band YES, from 1969 to the present: In 1969, Yes is formed with Jon Anderson on vocals Peter Banks on guitar, Bill Bruford on drums, Tony Kaye on keyboards and Chris Squire playing bass. This group records

The Beginning of an Explanation

When I dropped off of the Internet, it wasn't meant to be a years long sabbatical. I thought I just needed a break; that I was getting burned out from writing Basement Songs and movie reviews for Popdose.com. Something cracked, though, and I couldn't consider writing even in a journal for a very long time. Things changed in the winter of 2017. While driving to pick up Jacob at theater rehearsal, I experienced my first panic attack. It started immediately after he got in the car at the theater and it slowly took over my body for the fifteen minute drive home. My skin became clammy and I felt myself removed from my body. My brain was empty and I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. I gutted it out until we walked through the front door. Without saying a word, I went upstairs, crawled into bed and got in the fetal position. I just wanted to close my eyes and shut out the world. The next morning I awoke exhausted, as if I'd exercised the previous day. That was the first time

The End of the Explanation

I don't want to drag this out for a series of extended posts; there's no need to go into the minute details. So I'll wrap up my ongoing mental health journey with this post. After I basically quit writing, I began the work on myself. From 2017 to the middle of 2019, the only things I wrote were 10 minute dramas for our church, and let me tell you, even those were a challenge. But when God gives you a deadline, you don't mess around. There was a real depression that came with the relief of not writing or worrying about writing scripts. Again, if I wasn't writing, what was I doing? I really struggled with this question because we had moved from Ohio to Los Angeles so I could pursue a career in film. Even though I'd written and directed a movie, and sold a script, in my mind that wasn't good enough. I couldn't appreciate all of the great things in my life, and the solid career that I had forged in animation over 18 years. It took some real work: a lot o