Sunday, November 30, 2008

Bruce's song from "The Wrestler"

Someone has posted the entire song Springsteen composed for "The Wrestler" on YouTube. If you haven't seen the trailer, well, the film looks like it could be something amazing. And this song (which runs over the end credits) is nothing short of stunning. With a haunting piano and Bruce singing with his guitar, you will have tears in your eyes.

Friday, November 21, 2008

"Some guys they just give up living
And start dying little by little, piece by piece
Some guys come home from work and wash up
And go racin' in the street"

--Bruce Springsteen

I've always interpreted that lyric as a tribute to those men and women who follow their dreams. They have to maintain a day job to pay the bills and provide for their families, but at night they go home and work on their dreams, whether it's building cars and racing them or writing that novel or screenplay they've had stored up inside them for years. The guys that are dyin' are the ones who give up on their dreams, letting life beat them down until all they do is work and come home.

As far as my dream goes, I feel like I've been dyin' a little lately. Life is just so damn complicated sometimes. I have to remind myself that even thought I haven't finished a script this year, I've actually written forty something essays about my life and put them out there for people to pick apart. On top of that, I've attempted being a critic for the first time in my life.

Still, I can feel time sliding through my grasp like that slime you buy your kids for birthday parties.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Monday, November 17, 2008

The run

I completed the first ever Malchus CF Half Marathon at 2 hours and 44 minutes, 59 seconds. My goal was to beat 2 hours 45 minutes. How about that?

Man, it was HOT. I drank through my first bottle of water before I hit 6 miles. Luckily, Julie and the kids met me at 6 miles, and later at 10 miles to refill my water bottle and bring me much needed lip balm. The Santa Ana winds were blowing up dust and beating the crap out of my face. This turned out to be one tough run. However, it was worth it. Julie, the kids, and our neighbors, the Wills, all greeted me with a streamer tape to cross at the end of my 13.1 miles.

Now, I am sore, and I am suffering a bit of a letdown. You spend all of this time preparing and raising money (well, we never stop raising money) and suddenly, you feel like it's just OVER. Although I feel a huge weight off of my chest (for the first time since March, I can sleep in during the week and not feel a little guilty about missing a run), there is a touch of sadness, too.

I will have picture tomorrow.


Sunday, November 16, 2008

The first ever Malchus CF Half Marathon

The Pasadena Marathon was canceled, thus I am going on with plan B.

I have mapped out a route in Santa Clarita that will give me 13.1 miles.

The first ever Malchus Cystic Fibrosis Half Marathon is on. The time now is 8:32 AM. The race begins in 30 minutes.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Marathon update

Well, we did not drive down to Pasadena today. The 5 freeway was closed for most of the day due to the fires in Sylmar (which we can see when we're driving around town). Instead of driving for 6 hours through a detour, we opted to stay home and wait. The freeways are no open (as of 7:00) and we await word that the air quality will be good enough to hold the race. If that's the case (which we won't offcially find out about until 4 AM), then we'll take off in the van by 5:00 tomorrow morning. The only snag may be that I don't have my bib or chip. If the run organizers insist on me paying $30 to pick up my stuff (which, technically I shouldn't be allowed to do since I didn't fill out some form) then I'll run the race anyway without the bib or chip.

Should we not be able to run n Pasadena tomorrow, I've mapped out 13.1 miles up here and I will run it instead. I have trained and tomorrow I am running for CF.

I am running for my family.


Thursday, November 13, 2008

Hello Dodger fans,

I feel your pain. The "negotiations" between management and Manny Ramierez's agent have come to an impasse. The Dodgers offered too little and Manny is about to walk. I feel you pain because I have been there. I have seen Manny talk kindly to the fans and assure them that he wants to be in Cleveland, only to bolt the minute someone offers him more money. I don't entirely blame him, the guy is a Hall of Fame slugger who has hitting instinct that we have not seen in generations. Despite what the Dodgers and other teams feel, I assure you that Manny will be playing ball for more than the 5 years he is asking for.

All of the blame can't be placed on Manny or his agent, Scott Boras. The Dodgers have done their part in this charade. They offered Manny a contract they knew he would turn down. Sound familiar Clevelanders? It still amazes me that a team of the staure of the Los Angeles Dodgers, one of the largest markets in the country, could not find a way to make this work.

Fear not, Angelenos, we hear rumblings that Arte Moreno, an owner who puts his pocketbook where his mouth is, may place an offer on the table for Manny. With Garrett Anderson gone, there's an opening for a big bat in the Angels' outfield. Can you imagine Manny and Vlade in the same lineup? It'll be Boston all over again.

Dodger fan, I just wanted you to know that you're not alone. We of the Clubs Who Feed Us a Crock of Shit Just to Try and Save Face Support Group are there for you.


Thursday, November 06, 2008

Another hard week is almost under our belt. Man, Jake had a really hard morning yesterday and it just wiped us out. I was on the verge of breaking down each minute. Coupled with a major letdown at work and I wasn't in good shape.

Today was much better.

Truth is, with Jake's birthday rapidly approaching and the race two days later, I been having some pretty heavy thoughts lately. Dark, terrible thoughts that crush my heart like and empty water bottle being compressed by a fist. On Monday, as we laid in bed trying to get to sleep, Jake was in the middle of our bed. He had this deep, horrendous cough that toook his breath away ad rattled his bones. Somehow he was able to get to sleep. I prayed hard that night. I clenched my hands together and pleased with GOd to watch over this little boy.

Damn it, it's not fair.

I should be in a joyous mood, ready to celebrate the life of my baby, and I can't escape the darkness perched just out of sight, in the back of my mind. Fuck you, asshole. That's what I want to say top the thoughts and and the anger.

Blessed. I'm blessed to have the arms of my kids to squeeze out the shit and make me feel better. I'm blessed to have people like Steve and Sara and Karyn and, thank God, Julie, my wonderful Julie, to keep my head above water. I felt like I was slipping a couple of times last week, but things are feeling better.

No, they are. I just needed to get that off of my chest.

Hey. How's it goin'. Anything happen since we last spoke?

You know when you have a deep cut and it's begun to heal? You know, it doesn't sting so much, just sort of itches, tugs at the skin? You know it's going to be better someday, but it still needs time.

Welcome to the new world, America!

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Monday, November 03, 2008

November roared in like a lion, pelting our city with a downpour of thunder and rain. It was quite fun, considering we don't get many rainstorms in Santa Clarita. Alas, it meant that I wouldn't be going on my 12 mile run Saturday morning. No matter, we hung out all day and didn't get dressed until sometime around 1:00. It was great.

I am in somewhat disbelief that election day is tomorrow. Julie just marveled at the fact that the Kerry/Edwards fiasco was four years ago. Where did those years go?

I've been pretty good about not following any of the polls and getting to caught up in the last minute happenings of this campaign race. Race. That's a funny word for the democratic process. Democracy isn't a competition. Democracy is not a game. This is serious business and the fact that so many get caught up in who is winning as opposed to who will lead our country with vision and confidence is worrisome.

I spoke with Steve yesterday afternoon and he's spent. He and his wife have been working for the Obama campaign in NC. His wife even shook Obama's hand (twice) at a ralley last Wednesday. Steve has expressed some concern that the polls are deceiving. I just don't believe it. If for some reason McCain ins this election, I fear that it will be a more polarizing administration than the one leaving office. Not just the fact that he has pissed off every single reporter in the land, but the fact that he has lost the respect of most of the nation both by the manner in which he chose to run his campaign, and the choice he made for running mate.

Some of you who read this blog may dis agree with me. Some of you may be thinking, why is Scott suddenly political. But if you've read thunderboplt long enough, you know how I think. One can't listen to the message in Springsteen's music and not feel a certain way about this country.

This leads to my final point tonight. Proposition 8 in California. Who's damn busniess is it whether a man and a man or two women want to get married? How does it harm you or me? It doesn't. Of churches don't want to marry gays and lesbians, that's their perogative. But to prevent them from going to the courthouse, from standing up in front of their family and friends and declaring their love, from preventing them from taking part in a community ritual, that is wrong. Plain and simple. It has nothing to do with schools. It has nothing to do with religion. It has everything to to with love and tolerance.

And if all of these people are so concerned about the "sanctity" of mariage, m,aybe thy should try to prevent to number of divorces that occur every year.

That's all for tonight.

Vote. Vote. I implore you to vote.


Sunday, November 02, 2008

Now in our 39th year!

Welcome back to thunderbolt, serving the community and the world for 39 years. Thank you for you long time support and readership.

The Staff