Thunderbolt

I have not written about our incident last Thursday and Friday, yet. On Thursday I wrote my thoughts out and was prepared to add it to the blog when Julie called me to come home again. I would rather wait until tomorrow when I can look at what I wrote, place it on the blog and then write with a little more perspective. We've been pretty crazed here as we worry about Jake's digestive troubles. He sometimes complains that his tummy hurts and we now question whether these complaints are his way of getting out of eating, or if he really has some discomfort from something blocking up his bowels. At this point we're kind of in a wait and see state of mind, which, when your child has an illness, isn't a comfortable way to be living. You want definite answers. This past weekend really cleared my head out, though, and I'm through worrying about how many runners we get for the marathon and whether or not my friends are running. At this point, I have to concentrate on my...

Haven't written for several days. We had some pretty emotional days since Wednesday and I wasn't ready to write about them in detail. I'll have something tomorrow. We took two trips to the emergency room with Jake and it wiped us out. I did make the long run yesterday morning. 8 miles. I started off pretty ragged, but found my legs by the last two miles. I felt great at the very end and for the first time in about a month, I felt optimistic about the marathon and my running. So far, we have raised about $1,600. I'm very happy about that, but there is still a long way to go. That's all for tonight. Aloha

It has been brought to my attention that, at times, my blog can be quite depressing. I was a little surprised to hear this. I don’t want to come across like our life here in California is one big major drag. Quite the contrary. We have a wonderful life. Our children adore each other and show a great deal of love and compassion toward their family and friends. And Julie and I seem to being closer than ever. Last week was a tough week. A lot of crap fell in one week. I believe it was the alignment of the stars. How else can you explain how the Indians were one game of first at the beginning of the week and then promptly dropped seven in a row? For those of you who aren’t into baseball, I apologize. However, I will make an attempt to find something positive to say in most of my entries. I believe that the only way to find your way out of the dark places is to generate some kind of positive thinking. And here is how the week ended on a good note: Friday night Budd and I took in...

Yesterday was one of the hard days. Financial worries are the most stressful thing in my life. The most discouraging news we received was that we've been turned down for California Children’s Services. Apparently we make too much money. Strange, when I look at our taxes from 2002 and 2003, we made almost half what me made in 2002 in 2003. And yet, we qualified last year. I really don't know how we'll make it when we have to begin paying that 20% for all of Jake's medicines and doctor visits. And I haven't gotten a raise in 3 years. And I can't really quit my job and go look for a new one because I can't afford to lose our benefits. And whose really going to hire a 35-year-old man as an administrative assistant? And it's too late to start my career over, not with a family and our situation. To make the day more pleasant, my dentist had a field day grinding away at one of my teeth. The fact that I've been grinding my teeth at night is not mak...

After the great feeling Monday morning, I was a bit distressed at how unprepared I was to run this morning. Stress, mostly, was bearing down once again. Worried about the California Children’s Services application. If they deem us too "wealthy" for the service, we're suddenly responsible for that portion of the medicines we haven't been paying for a year. I don't need to tell you how fast our credit card debt will increase and how fast out Savings will be depleted. At some point it has to get easier, doesn't it? Times like these I wish I could curl up in a ball and squeeze my eyes shut tight to make everything go away. However, I have enough of a grasp on reality to know that this method only works when you are three to five years old or if you are insane. Still, I was able to squeeze out a decent run this morning, taking on the Decoro hill and pushing myself to run a little faster than usual. In the end, it was worth it. The day was filled with old fr...

Today was Sophie's first day of kindergarten and she did AWESOME! I can't believe how well she did when Julie dropped her off at the school. While a little nervous at first, she settled right in and even waved goodbye to Julie when her teacher took the class outside and the parents were leaving. I am so proud of her. Still, it's kind of sad, she's growing up so fast. I am constantly amazed at how bright she is, but it tugs on my heart. Julie is sad, too. Sophie is now going to be in school every day for the next 13 years. That "freedom" of a certain age of childhood is slipping away from us. Still, you can’t beat hearing the tremendous level of joy and excitement that she had when she called me before and after school. I ran for about 45 minutes this morning and I felt great. The first good Monday run I've had in a long time. Must have something to do with settling in to the Pasadena runs on Saturdays. The rest of the day, for me, was average....

I didn't know what to expect this morning when I arrived at the group run down by the Rose Bowl. I was pleasantly surprised to see my old training partner, Sebastian, on hand to train for a half marathon. We ran two miles together until he turned back. I ran on. I wanted to get in 8 miles. Up ahead of me for the first 4 miles was a man named Peter Lyons, who is from Valencia and is also running for CF. When he turned around at mile 4, I was about 100 yards behind him and so I ran the last 4 miles back with him. Although I had to switch from a 5/1 to a 3/1 for the run back, it was worth it. It's always better to run with someone. It makes the time go by faster and you get to know someone you might not otherwise meet in your daily life. Peter's nephew has CF, so the cause is close to his heart. We had a nice conversation all the way back and I hope to see him again in the upcoming weeks. I'm going to send him my letter this coming week to help him get started wi...