Skip to main content
This is the part where I question what I'm doing. This is the part where I try and find inspiration and wonder if I should be writing this script at all. This is the part where I force myself through the first draft because I don't have anything to show after a god damn year and this was supposed to be an easy assignment. This is the part where I question whether I have any talent at all and cry myself to sleep. This is the part where you tell me to get my act together and finish the fucker because you need to sell a script.

I get through the day and the pit of self doubt sits in my stomach. I'm avoiding sitting down to write because I'm afraid. Instead of writing for myself, I'm trying to write to please someone else and this isn't working. If I could just get to that place of not caring.

Meanwhile, the minutes tick away.

Aloha

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

MARATHON FOOTNOTES (for those who didn't think I would really footnote a stream of consciousness thought): Footnote #1 Academy Award Winning Best Picture Films from 1969 to the Present: Midnight Cowboy, Patton, The French Connection, The Godfather, The Sting, The Godfather II, One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, Rocky, Annie Hall, The Deer Hunter, Kramer Vs. Kramer, Ordinary People, Chariots of Fire, Gandhi, Terms of Endearment, Amadeus, Out of Africa, Platoon, The Last Emperor, Rain Man, Driving Miss Daisy, Dances With Wolves, The Silence of the Lambs, Unforgiven, Schindler’s List, Forrest Gump, Braveheart, The English Patient, Titanic, Shakespeare in Love, American Beauty, Gladiator, A Beautiful Mind, Chicago, Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King. Footnote #2 Members of the band YES, from 1969 to the present: In 1969, Yes is formed with Jon Anderson on vocals Peter Banks on guitar, Bill Bruford on drums, Tony Kaye on keyboards and Chris Squire playing bass. This group records...

A Trip Through the "My 90's Tapes" Collection Pt. 9: Mötley Crüe, "Girls, Girls, Girls"

Column 3, Row 13: Mötley Crüe , Girls Girls Girls. I was never a big fan of Mötley Crüe. I liked their radio hits, but I never listened to one of their albums in their entirety until 1989’s Dr. Feelgood , which was orchestrated in a way to dominate radio stations and suck in casual fans, like me, who had trouble getting past the Crüe’s purposeful sleaziness. That said I always admired them more than the other Sunset Strip bands. Bassist Nikki Sixx and drummer Tommy Lee were such a formidable rhythm section and laid down a solid groove to all their music. Guitarist Mick Mars had a knack for making his guitar hiss sinister, matching his perpetual scowl. Vince Neil was nothing to write home about as a vocalist, which made his unpolished singing just a little more intriguing than most of the other front then who dominated mainstream rock in the mid-late 80’s. Girls Girls Girls was released in May of 1987, just in time for a long summer of Mötley Crüe taking over the mi...

A Short Tribute to Jacob on his 23rd Birthday

Jacob turns 23 today.  As I write this, he's in the other room watching Deadpool and Wolverine laughing his ass off. I love that he's held on to his affection for comic books and video games into adulthood and how he's able to quote a movie after seeing it only once.  What I love more is that he remains a caring and empathetic human being, despite the hardships he's faced in life, that he continues to be funny and creative, that he's passionate about the issues that are important to him, in particular LGBTQ rights, and that he's supportive of his friends, his sister, and all of his cousins. Is he perfect? I don't give a shit. He's my son and I'm so damn proud of him. He's a fighter and he inspires me almost every day. I started blogging 21 years ago, as I began training for a marathon to raise money for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. If you dig around in the "Thunderbolt" archives, you'll find updates on his health, the many Basem...