I've now come to dread Mondays more than I did a few weeks ago. We began recording dialogue for the new series on Mondays. It's bad enough that I'm worrying about every small detail the morning of the records, but it effecting my Sunday nights, too. I go to bed and stress about forgetting to have scripts ready or ordering food. Ugh. Some pointless to worry about it all. Ther are such bigger issues.
Today was great, though, because I took a half day and went to see Jake's last soccer class. As I watched him running after the soccer ball in the mass group of kids chasing it, I suddenly became that psycho dad, cheering him on, giving him coaching advice. It was so exciting. I was beaming the whole time. But, in the back of my mind I kept thinking, "This is the perfect sport to keep him healthy. Lots of running." Christ, even simple pleasures like watching you son excelling in a sport get clouded by the other thing.
Speaking of CF, Julie had one of her shittiest days in memory. Just a lot of hassles with Jake's school next year over a health plan for him. Julie has something in mind and the school has been resistant. On top of that, the two people she's been communicating with have been... jerks, to put it nicely. Obviously they don't get it. You HAVE to let us ease into this. It's not like he's been going to school his whole life. Jake is going to starting kindergarten and this will be his first real year at a school ()not counting pre-school). Of course we're going to be proetective and have certain things we want. Can't they just meet with us and hear us out before being so dismissive? Julie had a stomach ache all night and was exhausted. The worrying, man, it takes so much out of you.
I know how she feels. Last Thursday I just wanted to curl in a ball and sleep the day away. All of this talk about depression made me depressed.
The night ended on a glorious note for me, though. As Sophie was getting ready for bed, she was singing one of my favorite Crowded House songs, "Weather With You."
"Everywhere you go/Always take the weather with you..."
When your daughter is walking around, picking up on the music you're playing and sharing in the joy of that same music, well, that's pretty damn special. Someday, I hope, she'll pull out some of my cd's and say, "Jeez, Dad, I didn't know you listened to..(insert band name here)". Then she'll ask what a cd is for and how can she play one of these shiny metal discs. I'll laugh, and say, "in my day, everything was stored on a flat, silver circle." Then she'll laugh and say, "What a bunch of losers!"
No. No. No. She won't laugh.
The walk is less than two weeks away. I'll be glad when the fundraising is over.